I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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