Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Randomize