why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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