some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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