We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
So vagazzling was a success
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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