Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
