Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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