All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
