just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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