she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
