we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
My dick has a subreddit
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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