Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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