I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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