I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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