shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize