I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
