He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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