let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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