If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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