trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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