K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
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