I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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