Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
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