had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
