Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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