Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize