I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize