Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
