Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize