in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
