at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
