ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
