It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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