I wanna bring you to show and tell
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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