I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
You're like the curious george of whores
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
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