therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
