my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
