any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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