I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize