its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
