I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
