And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
