I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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