I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize