those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
