I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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