Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
