Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
