ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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