I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
