Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
