Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
My pussy is not your playground.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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